Anxious About Halloween Parties? Seattle Anxiety Therapist Shares Ways to Manage During Holiday Party Season

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Spooky season is fun when you get to choose to be scared on purpose, not when you’re anxious about going to parties. Halloween parties are often the kick off to an increase in social gatherings related to the holidays. As the weather changes, gets darker, colder, and more rainy, people go inside into smaller, confined spaces. Whether you’re planning to casually hang with friends, go to a costume party, or haunted house, check out the ways you can deal with social anxiety during this holiday season.

What Are Symptoms of Social Anxiety?

You may struggle with social anxiety if you find yourself stressed out in social situations or worried about possible judgement from others. This judgement can be real or perceived. You might be afraid that other people are watching you or feel like you must perform a specific way in front of others. For many people, social anxiety can happen regardless of the size of the group or crowd, but for others, a larger amount of people can increase stress and anxiety. People who struggle with social anxiety are often worried other people are negatively evaluating them to a degree that is out of proportion to the situation. You may avoid social situations and find yourself searching for an excuse to cancel. Social anxiety can also relate to fears such as public speaking.

Why Do I Struggle With Social Anxiety?

There is no direct cause that lead people to struggle with social anxiety. It can be a combination of psychological, social, and contextual factors. It can also be related to previous traumatic or stressful experiences in social situations. For some people it can be related to living in a world that wasn’t created for them, such as people in larger bodies, people who have disabilities, or marginalized populations worried about safety such as people of color, queer folks, and women. There can be a fine line between perceived threat and actual threat. Social anxiety is also common with people who are neuro-diverse. Neuro-diverse folks can easily get overstimulated by groups or crowds and dread attending social situations. A thorough assessment of your history, symptoms, and cultural context can help navigate appropriate treatment and interventions.

What Worsens Social Anxiety?

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It’s important to understand factors that contribute to worsening social anxiety symptoms.

·      Substances:

You may reach for a glass of wine or use some marijuana to calm down before an event. Be mindful of how you use substances as over time they might actual increase anxiety or negatively impact your quality of life in other ways.

·      Triggers:

Certain triggers specific to you can worsen anxiety. They’re important to know.

·      Avoidance:

Most likely there will be social situations you can’t avoid or that you don’t want to avoid. Avoidance of challenging situations end up backfiring most of the time because the situation gains more power over you rather than you gaining more power over it. It’s understandable and nothing to beat yourself up over, but avoidance isn’t a great long-term strategy.

·      Co-occurring Issues:

If you are dealing with other mental health issues, they may make it harder for you to face the social anxiety. That is why it’s important to share a thorough history and account of your struggles.  

What Relieves Social Anxiety?

There is no magic bullet or quick fix for social anxiety, but it is extremely treatable. Here are some ways you can start helping yourself today:

·      Identify triggers:

Identify what it is specifically about social situations that send you into an anxious spiral. Then you can better target and strategize your experience to be more enjoyable!

·      Get support:

Make sure at least one trusted person knows what you’re struggling with or going through that can be a support for you. Mostly likely your friends and loved ones want to help you as much as possible. Even better is if you can ask for specific kinds of support.

·      Mindfulness/Meditation:

Mindfulness can include a meditation practice but it doesn’t have to just be meditation. You can do any activity mindfully or mind-lessly. With awareness, in the present moment, without judgement, you can turn any activity into a mindful activity! If meditation interests you, there are many great paid and free applications out there to try.

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·      Movement:

When was the last time you moved your body and enjoyed it? Movement is a great way to get out excess energy and for people who struggle with anxiety of any kind, it can be an important addition to an overall gameplan.

·      Self-Soothing:

Strategies such as progressive relaxation, deep breathing, tapping, and more all qualify under self-soothing. This takes awareness to know when symptoms might be starting and to intervene before you spiral.

·      Stop Avoiding:

Realize how harmful avoidance is to your long-term happiness and success. A great way to start small is to visualize yourself in a social situation you want to attend. This way you start facing the trigger way before you physically attend. Of course, try to be as patient and kind to yourself as possible.

·      Identify assumptions, beliefs, deeper fears:

Sometimes social anxiety can be a result of certain beliefs, assumptions or deeper fears of rejection. It’s helpful to unpack these with a professional, but you can start asking yourself what some of these things are for you today.

Reach Out to a Seattle Anxiety Therapist

If you’re looking at the next few months with dread about all the social events coming up, consider reaching out for a free therapy consultation. I’d love to talk about how I may be able to help you in your journey. Social anxiety is treatable, and you can feel better and actually enjoy your life. Schedule a free consultation below.

About the Author: Seattle Therapist Chelsea Kramer LMFT

Chelsea Kramer is a Seattle Therapist who works with individual and families facing grief, anxiety and trauma, with special focus on medical challenges, reproductive health, and life transitions.

Learn more about Chelsea’s specialties: grief, anxiety, infertility, pregnancy loss, chronic illness, menopause, medical trauma

Learn more about Chelsea

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